Just when you have got used to the adage ‘less is more’, I come along and turn the whole philosophy on its head! This is because in order to be happy I believe more is less and here’s why;

One of the fundamental things MOST of us suffer from is a lack of self–belief at one level or another. So the less we believe in ourselves the more we suffer. The reverse is also true, the more we believe in ourselves the less we suffer. And when I say ‘suffer’ I mean really suffer! From lack of time with our families to work pressures and frustrations – and from relationship woes to feelings of anxiety due to self–consciousness…believe me, this is how women suffer! All of it is due to a lack of self–belief.

No matter what the symptoms, the cause is always the same. So how do we get more of what we want i.e. more time with our families, more loving relationships, more confidence and more energy? Additionally, how do we have less work stress, less anxiety, less frustrations and less guilt? Yes! That’s right! We need MORE self–belief!

If having more belief in oneself is the answer, then how can that be achieved easily and quickly? Here’s the thing, you can only achieve this…and I mean ONLY if you really want to make some changes in your life. Ask yourself, ‘Am I ready to make the commitment necessary to make some vast improvements in my life?’ You need to ask yourself this, and answer honestly because as women, we have a tricky and complex mind that can fool us into believing we want something but actually will trip us up later and will cause us fail.

The culprit is our subconscious mind. It has its own agenda when it comes to goals and changing habits because it doesn’t like to make changes at all…it likes what it knows and wants to stay where it is comfortable and familiar. But because it is our subconscious mind, we are not always aware of its hidden agenda.

Does this sound familiar to you?! Have you ever tried to diet or exercise or read more for example, or keep a New Year’s resolution? Did it fail after a while? Do you know why it failed? The bet is that your subconscious had a lot to do with it.

So how do we make sure our subconscious mind does not sabotage our future efforts? Yes! That’s right! We need MORE self–belief! If you have few negative thoughts or beliefs about yourself, your subconscious mind has no reason to sabotage your success. Therein lies the vicious circle…you need more self–belief to be committed to make the necessary changes and you need more self–belief to ensure you do not sabotage your own efforts!

So where and how do we begin? There are amazing exercises and a system for doing this is my book ‘The Happiness System for Women’, but for this article I shall get you started by asking you to complete the following questions;

1. What do I need right now to help me get more of what I want in life?

2. Who or what can help me achieve that?

3. What is the main thing that is holding me back?

4. Who or what can help me overcome this?

5. What do I intend to change or improve in my life today?

6. Is their anything missing that can help me move forward?

7. What is my overall intention when it comes to my personal life?

8. What is my overall intention when it comes to my work life?

9. How to do I intend to be successful with these intentions?

10. What or who can help me achieve these quickly and effectively?

Answer these questions as fully and as honestly as you can. Also do not be afraid of getting the assistance or guidance you need in life and be aware of the areas that require a little helping hand.

Next let’s look at how to get what you want. If you answered the 10 questions about getting what you want above then get ready to move beyond thinking and into action.

Now you should have a good idea of how you can get what you want in life both personally and professionally without any obstacles and with an appropriate support structure.

So what’s next? How do you turn an intention into action? It’s all about making that first step. You do not want to become overwhelmed with your intentions. Stay in charge of your development by breaking things done into easy-to-handle bite-size pieces.

First you need to decide which area needs your attention first…your personal life or your professional one? Which ones seems the most urgent to you right now? Once you have chosen your area of focus, choose one goal or intention within it.

Now you have the first area of development ready for action! Write out your intention or

goal clearly and concisely. It is always important to include a deadline when you have a purpose so write down a date by which you want this to be real, an actual part of your life. Work backwards from that date to today. Now what is the very first thing you have to do today to move you forward enough so that you are on track with your goal’s time line? Do this for each day so that you have planned each move you make right up to the end date. Once you have done this you have pretty much achieved your goal in your mind at least. Think about the day you have achieved your goal as if it had already happened. Answer the following questions:

1. What does it feel like?

2. Who or what is around you?

3. Where are you?

4. What do you hear?

5. What do you smell?

Make the experience as real as possible. Use all your senses, imagination and creativity so you really ‘see’ it. When you have a clear vision of your intention being realized then you are using your sub-conscious mind power to help you achieve it instead of it working against you. Seeing your goal come to its fruition will give you the added confidence and competence to help you achieve it for real.

At any time you fail to achieve one of your intentions, think about whether you sabotaged yourself at all. Nine times out of ten you will realize that it was you who stopped yourself from achieving what you wanted for whatever reason…and underneath that reason is a lack of self-belief. Here is an exercise to help you improve your self-belief:

1) Be confident that the end result is possible.

Has someone else achieved this goal? If so then it must be possible List 5 people who have achieved or are currently achieving this or a similar goal. The more similar they are to you and your current position the better. If no-one has achieved your goal yet, list 5 things which people have achieved which are similar in some way to your goal, or which can be a source of inspiration to you. As soon as you can say with total conviction ‘it really is possible to achieve this goal’ it’s time to move on to step 2. If you can’t do this yet, look for more examples of people achieving amazing feats and overcoming overwhelming odds and add them to your list until you do believe your goal is possible.

2) Believe that the end result is possible by you.

Remember what you have achieved in the past – surely you have the necessary skills and abilities to do this too? If not, where can you get them?

3) Really want the end result

Ask yourself now – do you really want to achieve this goal – or is it just nice to have? Make a list of how achieving this goal would benefit your life and the life of others.

4) Believe that you deserve the end result.

Do you feel you deserve to achieve your goal? If you don’t then you will sabotage your own efforts.

5) Achieving your end goal must not contradict any other beliefs or values you have

Is there anything which doesn’t seem right? Are there any values which you are contradicting? Is there anything or anyone in your life that you are neglecting? Do you feel totally right about achieving this goal?

If the answer to any one of these questions is yes, change the vision of your end result so that it fits in with your beliefs, and what is right for you. Make it so that it feels just right. But make sure that they are not just excuses for you not going ahead with your goal.

Finally…

Include a review of progress at key points along the way so you can learn from your experiences.

Know that you do not have to know all the steps now. The future is uncertain so it is not always possible to plan everything. Plan what you can for the moment, and then make a new plan once those steps have been taken. If you continue to do this, and learn from your experience you are likely to achieve your goal in the end.

Alexandra Watson has helped countless women create happy and fulfilling lives through her happiness system. She has developed a fool-proof, easy-to-follow seven step system to happiness that any woman can use and see results fast. John Gray, author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus calls Alexandra’s book The Happiness System for Women ‘a vibrant and exciting journey to the centre of your soul’. Alexandra has featured internationally on TV, radio and in many publications. She can be contacted by email on: HappinessAuthor@aol.com or visit her website at http://www.AlexandraWatson.com

If you’re an employer or a manager then work place absenceis costing you money, inconvenience, and upsetting yourcustomers. And as we all know, not all days taken off workare due to genuine sickness. Many employees “take a sickie”because their morale is low and they just don’t like orcan’t do their work.

The challenge for employers and managers is to make peoplehappier at work. And if people are happy at work then theyare less likely to take a day off every time they wake upwith a stuffy nose. Some bosses think that paying moremoney, improving job security or working conditions is theanswer. It isn’t and it’s also something that can be veryhard to achieve.

People who employ or supervise other people need to becomemore tuned to their employees’ emotional needs and find outwhat really motivates them. This is also much easier toachieve than paying more money or improving job security,however there is no quick fix. Some years ago I inherited atele-sales operation with low staff morale and poor salesresults. It took nearly a year to fix. The long-termbenefits were of course worth it in terms of fewer days lostdue to sickness and an increase in business.

To reduce the number of sickies there are four steps youneed to consider. Firstly, pick the right person for thejob. There’s a television advertisement running at presentfor a recruitment company. It highlights the fact that manypeople are in the wrong job for their skills and attributes.The daft thing is that it was an employer or manager whoputthem in the job in the first place. We need to get better atinterviewing and selecting people. Take more time over it;pay more attention to the applicant’s human side rather thantheir qualifications or experience. Get to know thembetter.

Find out what makes them happy, how well they get on withother people and how much energy and enthusiasm they have.Make sure they know what they’re getting into and be surethe job suits them.

A manager in the telecom industry was telling me about anengineer who was taking too many sickies. He was beingblamed for a poor attitude to his work. His job involvedworking in tunnels under the city repairing and installingequipment. Eventually it was discovered that the poor guywas claustrophobic and was trying to deal with it on hisown. He still works for the same team but in a job thatdoesn’t involve small spaces. It’s not always easy to movepeople, which emphasises the importance of getting it rightin the first place.

Secondly, you need to believe in your people. If you’veinterviewed well and picked the right person for the jobthen you need to trust them to do that job. You need toconstantly demonstrate to your people that you trust andbelieve in them by what you say, your tone of voice and yourbody language. If you believe that your people are not tobetrusted, that they’re unable to make a decision withoutchecking with you. That they’ll turn up late and go homeearly, then that’s exactly what they’ll do. If on the otherhand you believe that they’ll do their job well, that theycan be trusted to make decisions and they will give you afair day’s work, then it is more likely this is what you’llget. As with all theories there is no guarantee that it willwork every time, however the majority of employees arereasonable people and if you treat them as such then theyare more likely to behave in

a positive manner.

The third and probably the most important thing you can doto motivate your people is to give them feedback and coachthem. This is where so many employers and managers fall downin dealing with their people; we are hopeless at givingfeedback. Many managers are uncomfortable telling staff howthey feel about their work performance.

Most employees want to know how they are performing in theirjob; they want to know if they are doing it right or howthey could do it better. If you really want to motivate yourpeople then you need to give them feedback on what they’redoing well and what needs improvement.

When you notice an employee doing something you do like,tell them about it. When you notice something you don’tlike, tell them about it. Do it as soon as possible. Acknowledging a job well done isnot much good six months later. Also, if you don’timmediately call someone’s attention to something you’re nothappy about, then they’ll assume its okay. Either that orthey’ll think you didn’t notice or you don’t care. Do it inprivate. Why is it some managers still feel its okay toreprimand someone in front of their colleagues? Even themildest rebuke can have a negative effect on morale.

When you do speak to the person use “I” messages. Say thingslike “I liked the way you did that” or “I’m unhappy withtheway your reports are always late and I’d like your views onwhy this is”. Avoid “You” messages such as “You’re doinggreat”. That can come across as patronising or insincere.”You’re doing that all wrong” may cause conflict, lowermorale and may not sort the problem.

Focus on one or two things. Don’t run off a whole list ofattributes or misdemeanours. Also be specific about jobbehaviour, focus on what the person did or didn’t do, don’t make a personal attack.

Employees will feel happier if they perceive theiremployer or manager as a reasonable and fair individual -someone who is quick to praise but also says when they’renot happy about something.

When we start to look at what motivates people at work, it’simportant to realise that we all have different needs. It’seasy to fall into the trap of believing that all our staffare motivated by money. However, research conducted over theyears into what motivates people at work suggests someother factors.

Money is important however people are more likely to bemotivated firstly, by the work itself. Secondly, by beingappreciated for what they do and thirdly by a feeling ofbeing in on things.

The message is – if you want motivated staff then make theirwork interesting, give them feedback and give them thefeeling that they’re involved in the business.

We can make the job more interesting by giving people moreresponsibility, assigning projects and by training anddeveloping them. We need to regularly give people feedbackon how they’re doing; focussing on what they’re doing wellrather than on what is not so good. To meet their need tofeel involved we should regularly communicate both formallyand informally. We could also involve staff in meetings theymight not normally attend.

These steps will take time and thought however they’ll makea huge difference as to how employees feel about their work.If they feel good and gain satisfaction from their workthen they’re less likely to find a reason to “take asickie”.

Alan Fairweather is the author of four ebooks in the “Howto get More Sales” series. Lots of practical actions youcan take to build your business and motivate your team.-http://www.howtogetmoresales.com

Love life. Lose track of time. Get caught up in the moment. Choose to be not only present but truly, utterly involved in the things you do. Sing, laugh, dance and play. Life really is too short to not participate passionately in every moment.

PUMP UP YOUR PASSION IN 6 SIMPLE STEPS:

1) Even when things seem to be going “wrong,” look for the gem in each experience. Are you one of those people who take the same route to work every day? Do you always eat at the same restaurant? Do you choose the same parking space every time you visit your favorite haunts? If you always do things the same way, you will always get the same results. Be willing to try something new. If you don’t like what you try, you’ve got a perfect reason to try something new the next day. If you do like what you try, it will give you the confidence to continue to search for other things that add joy and passion to your life.

2) View each situation you encounter this week as an opportunity to live passionately in the moment. Here’s an example: Your spouse or significant other is passionate about historic facts and monuments. You are not as interested in history but love to learn new things. Therefore, when you travel together and visit notable places, your partner focuses on the historic significance and you focus on how this experience may apply to current events. By slightly shifting your perspective, you will be more able to become passionately involved in the moment.

3) Document some of the moments that stand out in your mind, either good or bad, and notice how your attitude affected the outcomes. Life really is about the journey. That is a difficult concept for those of us who are always striving toward a particular goal. Savoring the moment means allowing yourself enough time to celebrate each victory before rushing on to the next event. When you’re working diligently to live to your full potential, give yourself permission to accept a reward: take a day off work, have a nice dinner, visit a nearby attraction or park, plan a vacation, or throw a celebratory get-together. Above all, acknowledge that you accomplished what you struggled to attain.

4) Exercise regularly. An active lifestyle is vital to your well-being. If you are so busy that you won’t schedule regular workouts, start by incorporating daily routines such as taking the stairs instead of the elevator, parking farther away from buildings, walking instead of driving whenever possible, even pacing and stretching at your desk while on the phone. Being busy is not an excuse to neglect your health. Exercise does not have to mean hours on an exercise bike or trips to the gym. Give yourself permission to improve your health and wellness without the guilt often associated with weight loss as the only objective.

5) Pencil

in a few appointments with yourself! Amid today’s culture of information overload and multi-tasking, taking time to “be” is a formidable challenge; grant yourself permission to schedule a few minutes of nothing! Be a trendsetter, write “alone time” in your calendar or take as many non-working lunches as you can for one whole week. Find at least 10 or 15 minutes each day to just sit quietly sipping your drink of choice. Shun all outside input: no idle conversation, no telephone, no reading, no radio, and no television; the point is to just ‘be” with yourself and your own thoughts. Use the time to think about where you have been, where you are going and how to live in the moment. This is not as painful as it may seem; difficult, and maybe a bit frightening, but you won’t know if this can help you pump up your passion unless you try.

6) Laugh at yourself! Don’t take life too seriously. Whether you are happy, sad, embarrassed, confused, or even indifferent, learn to laugh at yourself. It’s impossible to know everything. It’s impossible to always do the right thing. Being human means making mistakes, learning from the experience and moving on to a new lesson. To live a life full of passion, you will have to let go of the need for perfection. When all else fails, look for a reason to laugh at yourself. Let go of the need to control what will happen next. Giggle, belly laugh, laugh until you cry — but just keep laughing and your pumped up passion is destined to unfold.

Use these six simple steps to create a more passionate lifestyle. When you decide to pump up your own passion you also seize the opportunity to add joy to the lives of others. A smile, a compliment, a small gift, or a card can make a world of difference in every life that is touched. Spread joy and your passion will soar!

*Copyright 2005 JoAnna Carey, Carey’D Away Enterprises, LLC.Adapted from the book Rat Race Relaxer: Your Potential & The Maze of Life. All rights reserved.

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About the author: JoAnna, aka “The Rat Race Relaxer,” is available for radio, TV and print interviews. She’s an energetic entrepreneur who merges her life experience and business success to perform enjoyable, influential presentations. She is the producer and host of her own weekly television program titled The Rat Race Relaxer™ Show and the author of Rat Race Relaxer: Your Potential & The Maze of Life. Contact Carey’D Away Enterprises, LLC at http://www.RatRaceRelaxer.com

Do you sometimes feel you just hate the world when thinking about your job, your life, your “Ex,” your neighbors, your community and all the BS on TV? Well you are not alone. Most people hate their job you know, in fact a recent survey showed that over 60 percent of our population hates their job and only 30 percent tolerates it. That means only 10% of those who have jobs like them; those lucky dogs.

Did you know that 45% of Americans surveyed hated their lives and only 10% was willing to say the loved their lives? In another recent survey done over 70% of Americans were divorced and 90% percent of those could find anything positive to say about their former spouse. Did you know that 50% of all Americans do not care for their neighbors and 40% of them will not even bother to have a conversation with them? In fact 25% will not let their children play with the kids on either side of their home. Only ten percent of the people in the study said

they really liked their neighbors and they were so fortunate and lucky to have them as both dear friends and neighbors.

Another recent showed that most Americans almost 66% did not like their communities, because they had changed over the years or there was too much traffic or some other legitimate reason. Actually in that poll only 10% loved their communities, got involved and said they had the best town or community in the country. Did you know that the average American watches 6 hours of TV per day and that most 79% said most of what was on TV was just BS. Only 10% of Americans watch less than 1-hour of TV per day. No wonder so many people hate the World? But unfortunately I have no good advice for you today on this, as I am one of the 10% and you are welcome to join me if you wish? Think on this.

“Lance Winslow” – Online Think Tank forum board. If you have innovative thoughts and unique perspectives, come think with Lance; www.WorldThinkTank.net/wttbbs/